Examine for yourself what love is and what love isn’t!
Magnifying the Law
Agape Love1 ¾
I Corinthians 13:4-7, 11 (The Living Bible)
Love is the fulfilling of the Law ¾ See Romans 13:8
4Love is very patient...
Superficial Masks
Not the patience that allows
you to do tedious things for hours on end, nor able to endure boredom; the
patience referred to here is the ability to love, respect, and appreciate
people¾especially the annoying,
obnoxious, unlovable ones.
And kind...
But not just good to
those who are good to you ¾ even the heathen do that2.
What do you have that they don't? Do you
love your enemies3?
Never
jealous...
Not the self-centered
jealousy that the world knows, that is controlling, possessive, suffocating,
and usually results in violence. Agape love transforms the love-starved
individual ¾ it leads him to the
realization that his true self-worth is only found at the cross. Love’s
“jealousy4” is a deep
yearning for total openness, honesty, and intimacy, but acknowledges that it
must first provide an environment that is safe if true, intimate communication
is going to take place. Once this atmosphere is provided then mutual trust,
growth, and healing can take place, resulting in a healthy relationship.
Or envious...
Are you happy for the
welfare of others? Are you content in all things, or do you think, “If only I
had this or could do that¾then I would be happy.” I show you a better
way5: instead, envy or
covet spiritual things6
such as faith, hope, and love, and the greatest of these is love7.
Never
boastful...
Do you need the
acclaim of others, or can you be content in knowing
the truth and letting it set you free without the need for the “drum roll” and
all of the fanfare that goes with glory-seeking? Agape love gives one an inner
confidence that is content with the truth and allows its actions to speak in
place of empty words.
Or proud...
There are two kinds of
pride: pride in doing your best (which is healthy) and the pride referred to
here, the excessive self-esteem that stands ready continually to guard its
reputation from mortification and insult8.
“The principle of the thing” is Satan's trap to keep the world in continual
upheaval. When we finally yield our wills to “the principle of love” then peace
will prevail. Where there is no pride,
there can never be a problem.
5Never haughty...
Love doesn't need the
flash, glitter, or pomp and circumstance. It never has to hide behind wealth,
titles, education, or any other shallow, superficial mask that makes one think
he is better than others. The carnal nature needs to victimize someone in
thought, word, or deed to get its daily injection of superiority to prop itself
up in its own eyes. Agape love is free of superiority complexes (which is simply
an over-inflated inferiority complex). A truly great person is humble.
Or selfish...
The carnal nature is
always on the lookout to take care of “numero uno”¾it is always
selfish. Self-preservation, to protect
self at all costs, is its prime motivation in life. Even apparent gifts of
generosity are polluted by a selfish motive. The carnal nature never gives
gifts¾it makes investments.
Later when it attempts to recapture some of the interest on its investment and
does not receive what it feels it deserves it cries, “I’ve been used!” The
truth is we can never be used, only exposed, as the
ulterior motive behind the “gift” is brought to light. Agape love is
“others-centered” rather than self-centered; it seeks the benefit, wellbeing,
and happiness of others, despite the consequences to itself. It gradually
changes us until we become more concerned about the rights of others then we
are for our own.
Or rude...
Never
rude. Love is courteous and always yields to “the
golden rule9.” Rudeness,
in plain and simple terms, is disrespect. It forgets that respect is a God-given
right, just like choice. It isn't something that is earned10. The cross of Christ is the great equalizer. Those
who truly love the character of Christ will treat people according to the value
He demonstrated on the cross. Agape love is “no respecter of persons11,” but treats everyone as
equal just as God does12.
Love does not demand its own
way.
What is a demand? God
has given everyone freedom of choice.
It is a God-given right to say “yes” or “no.” If we can't take a “no” without getting mad
though we sugarcoat it with a “please”, it is still a demand
nonetheless. This tidbit of information is a vital key to successful
relationships.
It is not irritable or
touchy...
The carnal heart is
one bad mood after another; but the love of God is “a peace that passes
understanding13.” It
can't be shaken or moved by situations and circumstances. It gives back neither
angry answers nor does it need vindication.
It does not hold grudges...
The carnal heart keeps
records of wrongs and plots revenge (“Righteous indignation,” to be sure! This
is how Satan keeps his prisoners captive). Selfless love does not insist on
“fairness,” because it realizes that “all things work together for good to
those who love God.14” It
forgives without being asked¾even if the perpetrator is unrepentant15. If someone intends to do it evil, selfless love has
learned to wait on the Lord. By allowing
God to rectify the situation instead of brooding over it, we will be set free
and can rejoice as we watch Him work it for good. Instead of resorting to
Satan's tools of force, fear, intimidation, and manipulation, we will emulate
God's methods of love, trust, respect, tact, and choice.
And will hardly even notice
when others do it wrong...
Love always places the
best possible interpretation on the actions of others. Focusing on self makes
us a time bomb just waiting to go off. Agape love is not “sensitive” because
there are more important things to be concerned with than its own feelings.
When we are focused on saving souls instead of our reputation, we will not take
neglects and slights to heart. We will
be deaf to reproach and blind to scorn and insult16.
6It is never glad about injustice, but rejoices whenever truth wins
out...
While love never
judges anyone, it never condones wrongdoing. It hates sin; but it loves the
sinner17. It is never
glad when others go wrong, even its enemies. Love rejoices whenever a lost soul
deceived by the enemy's lies is won over by truth, and is happy that that
person is saved from his destructive behavior and/or lifestyle.
7If you love someone you will be loyal to him no matter what the
cost. You will always believe in him,
always expect the best of him, and always stand your ground in defending him...
Agape love is
consistent in its loyalty and commitment18.
You can rely on its unfailing dedication because it does not “sometimes
believe, frequently expect the best, and more often than not defend,”
but always. The world's sick
version of love is basically, “If you meet my needs and expectations, then I'll
be your friend; but if you cross me, I'm going to be your worst nightmare.”
While the carnal heart is invariably a “fair-weather friend,” love is an
“all-weather friend.” It is unconditional love. God’s agape love speaks
the words that every human being wants to hear: “I will always love you no
matter what.”
When one’s
personality is rebuilt, known as “the renewing of our minds19” by the Holy Spirit, then his character or
personality will be built on a foundation of absolute truths. To the
co-dependent nature the rhyme should read: “sticks and stones can break my
bones, but names will totally annihilate me.” But when we partake
of God's divine nature20,
we will become so free and mature that finally we can honestly say, “sticks and
stones can break my bones, but names will never hurt me.” Or better yet:
11When I was a child I spoke and thought and reasoned as a child does.
But when I became a man… I…put away the childish things."
God is love21. Agape love is a
description of God Himself. There is a law¾and it is as faithful as the law of gravity¾that you will become like the person you admire, or
“by beholding you will become changed22.”
So “choose you this day whom you will serve23.”
1 There
are several words for “love” in Biblical Greek, like phileo (affection) and eros
(romantic love). Agape (pronounced “uh-gah’ pay”) is the Greek word
used in the Bible to describe God’s love¾this chapter defines that “love.” 2 Matthew 5:45, 46; Luke 6:32, 33
3 Matthew
5 1
Corinthians
7 1
Corinthians
14 Romans
1)
How does your
interpretation of love differ from agape love?
2)
Would you prefer
to love and be loved by the world’s love or agape love? Why?
3)
Do you think this
kind of love can be attained by simply using your “will power?” Explain.
4)
Since there
exists a law that you must “sow” to “reap,” do you have this kind of agape love
in you (to sow), and if not where must you go to get it?
5)
Do you think the
use of force, fear, and violence can produce a lasting and loving
relationship? Explain.
6)
Do you think that
love is a feeling/emotion, or is it a principle¾something you do despite the feelings? Explain.
7)
How would
somebody go about living this kind of love?
8)
How has this
tract helped to open your eyes to the length, depth, and breadth of what real
love is?
9)
Do you think
agape love could help resolve problems in your relationships or even in making
situations in your life happier? Explain.
10)
What is the
difference between unconditional love (agape love) and co-dependency?
11)
If agape love can
only be received by yielding our lives to the Holy Spirit, what would it take
for you to accept God’s powerful promises to transform you into His love?
Send questions or comments to:
Magnifying the Law
1996 by Keith
A. Johnson